One man’s true story experiences after finding, buying and living The Pearl of Great Price. 195 short posts
Perhaps I was just extreme. But, until I understood God’s Grace, I would literally have a discouraging thought, perhaps every few minutes. Or even more frequently than that. For example, EVERY thing that I noticed that was undone that “needed to be done” would give me a “zap” of discouragement. Like, “Oh, that bill didn’t get paid on time. I feel bad we’ll have a late fee.” Or, “I haven’t called my daughter in quite a while. I feel a bit bad about that.” Or, “I haven’t been through those papers on my desk. I really should have done that.” Or “The baseboards in my house are dirty. I can’t believe I let them get that way.” Or “I can’t believe I’ve been using Microsoft Word for 15 years, and I still don’t know how to use the ‘clipboard’ function.” And on and on.
In addition, if I could spot a flaw in anything that I HAD done, I’d feel bad, too. “I really talked about myself too much in that recent interaction I had with Chuck at church. How embarrassing.” Or, “I bet Mary could smell the smoke on my breath when we spoke the other day. I’m trying to hide the fact that I’m smoking again.” Or, “I know it looks like I’m succeeding in business. But my affairs are really a mess.”
It was all about my performance. And since I knew the word of God quite well, I was very sensitive to all my “failures”. I could literally be driving down the street, letting my mind wander, and be “zapped” with a bit of discouragement/failure every minute or so. As I said, perhaps this is extreme. But this is how I experienced life. A RACE to try to get enough things done, and done right, that I could never win. My mind consistently drifted to all my shortcomings. I was also quite a list maker. I could not even put on my lists all the things I needed to do.
Then I came to understand and believe the 100% Grace of God. I realized that since I was already perfect because God had proclaimed this to be so, I grew to stop all that self-accusation. With this breakthrough, much of my depression, anxiety and addictions stopped. Unlike before, I could literally take a 30 minutes drive from one place to another, and do it in great joy, without being interrupted by any discouraging thoughts.
Understanding the Grace of God settles our issues related to eternity. But, it also settles lots of issues related to our time-and-space existence in this life. I’d like to discuss this with you if you want this freedom.